Oh What Joy

I was in a valley.
I was tightly bound.
There were dry bones
All around.
I was in a pit,
And sinking fast.
I had nothing to hold on to,
Nothing to grasp.
I wasn't going to last much longer,
I was sinking so fast.
There was death all around me,
In a place where nothing lasts.
I was so scared,
I was terrified.
Trying to break free,
I fought and I cried.
My mom and my dad
Couldn't rescue me.
My sisters and my brothers
Couldn't set me free.
In a valley so deep and forsaken,
I didn't have the skills I needed to cope.
Vultures and sin were eating at my flesh.
My life had no hope.
I fought and tried to get away.
My heart was broken and so sore.
There was no one to help me,
But somehow, I thought there must be more.
Something was tickling my memory.
I thought about stories I'd heard.
Something about a man named Jesus,
And how he taught God's word.
The stories said he was knocking at my heart.
They said he could wash away my sin.
They said he was a gentleman, and kind,
And that he would keep knocking until I let him in.
Those stories said he could unbind me.
They said he could make me clean and whole again.
They said all I had to do was ask.
So I asked, and I prayed.
I knew there was a God; I hoped the stories were true.
"Jesus, would you come into my heart today?
Can you get me out of this mess I've made?
Would you come into my heart to stay?"
Oh what joy, because the stories were true.
Oh what joy, those stories I heard.
Oh what joy, I'm one of those stories today.
Oh what joy, all because of God's precious word.

Embers and Fire

I'm thinking about fire tonight. I read a couple of poems I wrote called Butterfly Wings and one called Billy and started thinking about fire for some reason. And now there's a poem in the works. So far it looks like this:



A tiny ember glowed in the dark.
It was hardly bright enough to notice,
But it made a tiny warm space in my heart.



Covered in ashes, slowly burning out,
There was no fuel to feed it,
I was slowly dying within and without.



And then I started thinking about the color of embers, and how they're red, and that's the same color of blood, and that led me to thinking about how Jesus died for us and covers us with His blood. I am so grateful that He was willing to do this for us. I know that I would not be where I am today without Jesus. I was a mess, trying to control the chaos around me and not succeeding, trying to keep the space around me calm and peaceful and getting nowhere close.



But that tiny ember got fed a little fuel called love, and turned into a flame. The flame kept getting fed love, and some hope got thrown in, and it turned into a campfire. Then the campfire turned into a bonfire because a lot more fuel got put into it -- hope, love, peace, joy, mercy, grace, righteousness, holiness, compassion, jealousy, and so much more than I can even think of right now. And that bonfire has been keeping me clean because it burns off the things that aren't from God, and makes me a better person. It makes me want to sing "Bless the Lord, oh my soul, and all that is within me. Bless His holy name." I think it's cool that everything in me, both the good and the bad, has to bow down and bless the Lord. And then I want to dance. Then I want to sing some more. And here I am, writing encouragement into me so I can have more hope and faith that I am doing what God wants me to do, and instead of going to bed I want to dance and shout for joy! God is so good!



Anyway, those were my thoughts for tonight. Embers are red. Blood is red. And red is my favorite color. Always has been. For me, red is not for anger, red is for love. Even when I was a kid and didn't know anything about God, because I was not brought up in the church. When I stop to think about it, I'm surprised I am who I am today because I sure enough shouldn't be here if all the things that have gone on in my life had come to fruition. God has had His hand on me my entire life, I just didn't know it back then. Thank you, Lord, for your mercy and grace, for your love, your peace, your joy. Time for bed now or I won't want to get up in the morning.

Quiet Time

The house is quiet. Robin is at work and James went to play basketball. No tv, no radio, and Rusty is sleeping at my feet. What joy when it's quiet! I don't understand the need people feel for noise all the time. My ears hurt, I get a headache, and I feel bombarded when I don't get peace and quiet. Don't misunderstand, I do like noise. I like to talk to people, I like to listen to music (but not full blast very often), I like to hear people in other rooms and know I'm not alone.

But I like alone time. I can think then. Or I can zone out if I want to, and not think at all because I've been thinking too much. It's easier to write when it's quiet. And God gave us a day of rest so we could have peace and quiet.

I do have work I need to finish. I do have chores that need doing. But those are always there. Peace and quiet are not, so I am taking advantage of it. I need to clear my brain, to slow down, to see, touch and smell the good things so I can be rejuvenated. An empty vessel needs to be filled up so it can give more. I like being an empty vessel and being filled with God's love and peace and joy.

Proverbs 17:1 Better is a dry morsel, and quietness therewith, than an house full of sacrifices with strife. (KJ)

Genesis 2:2 And on the seventh day God ended his work which he had made; and he rested on the seventh day from all his work which he had made. (KJ)

So for this hour or so I will rest in the peace that God has seen fit to give to me. And when James gets home, I will be ready to cook supper, to listen to him, etc. etc. I need a new poem about peace, I think.